Isaac Garcia's Blog

Blind Panic - The Idiots Want 'Plan B'

One of the stupidest articles ever written:  It's Time for Plan B

While the planet cools - some scientists are in a blind panic over trying to "regulate the Earth."

Good luck.

Meanwhile, it appears that sunspot activity is the lowest its been in over 100 years; a trend that has often preceding a cooling period - including The Little Ice Age.

We'll just ignore this point.

Woman in Burqa Walking On Mars

Apparently, the Mars Rover took a picture of a woman in a burqa walking around on Mars. Or is it an Al Qaeda training camp?  Or is it Bigfoot?

How To Choose A Printer

I was on some random website that had an inserted video link of a husband and wife sitting on a sofa.  It was the typical stereotype of the fat slob, sloppy husband who somehow managed to hook the cute, thin, perky, wife.

The short video was actually an Epson commercial - on How To Choose the Right Epson Printer.

At first, I thought to myself, this is ridiculous, silly and useless.  But, I was oddly intrigued and ended up watching the video, clicking on the link and visiting the website.  I proceeded to answer the series of questions on how to select the right printer for myself - not because I need a printer - but because the questions were presented in this absurd, dream-state, scientific lab, ala The Matrix environment that kept me interested just enough to answer all of the questions.

Is this good marketing?  I can't tell - but it worked.   

I'm a C120.

Help Apple Go Green: The Ruse and a Rant

Saturday night my wife and I stop in at the Apple Store in Pasadena.  My wife wanted a new set of head phones for working out to go with her "old school" Shuffle. 

While we were in line to pay for the headphones, an energetic young lady came up to us with her roving checkout scanner and offered to check us out and process payment (great idea by the way - I also noticed another Apple representative helping a couple in line.  They wanted an iPhone and he went and got it and they paid right there.)  At the end of the transaction the nice young lady asks in her chipper LA voice:

Would you like to help Apple Go Green and we'll email you your receipt?

Uh, I don't think so.  I immediately said no.

Now, the helpful young lady was really nice and she was just doing her job (I don't hold any of this against her - well, not directly) - I realize this.

What REALLY BOTHERED me about the question (and the reason why I said "no") is that the question is VERY DECEPTIVE. 

While I'm sure the Apple corporation has a vague and slight intention to "go and be green" - I'm pretty sure that it wasn't/isn't the driving force for wanting to "email me my receipt."

Anyone with half a brain knows that they wanted my email address for three big reasons OTHER than "going green" - marketing, costs and returns. 

1.  Marketing
So that they could email market to me.  Or, as we used to call it in the late 90s - "Permission Marketing."

2.  Costs
Emailing a receipt is cheaper than having a human being process the transaction, print the receipt and hand it to me.

3.  Returns
By emailing a receipt to me I'm more likely to forget about it and thus reduce the opportunity to return the item I bought.  I believe Apple has a 14 day exchange/return policy - to be honest - I don't know their policy. 

Speaking of policy - this method of acquiring a customer email address is ideal for a marketing company because it skirts around all of those pesky Privacy Policy issues and guarantees that get in the way of the marketer being able to sell or share my email address with other people. 

At least when you fill out a paper form or an online form you have the OPTION to check the box and AGREE or DISAGREE with the Privacy Policy of the company.  Additionally, the forms of any legitimate company ALWAYS STATE that "We will never sell or share your emaill address or information with any third party." 

But - on the showroom floor - all of these issues are conveniently avoided (at the expense of the consumer). 

After giving your email address to Apple to "help them go green" they can LITERALLY do anything they want to do with it.  You (nor they) agreed to nothing. 

Now, before all of you Apple Lovers out there get all angry at me painting Apple in a bad light (you see, Apple is the new Google - they can do no evil in the eyes of many people), I realize that Apple PROBABLY isn't in the business of selling or sharing your email address with shady marketing companies - but you see, that's just it, we don't know what they can or will do with your information.

Sure, you are "helping Apple go green" - I get it - but that is just the ruse.  Don't you get it?  They are GUILTING you into giving them your information because, "Hey, who doesn't want to help the environment?"  And besides, Apple would never do something bad with my email address.....

Yeah right.

Just think for yourself and don't let anyone RUSE you into giving them your information for a trendy cause.  Helping Apple "go green" should be LAST on YOUR list of "things to do to help the environment."

For those of you who "helped Apple Go Green" and gave them your information - go ahead an put on your plastic manufactured headphones in your plastic manufactured ipod (or iPhone) with its non-eco friendly batteries that you bought in the energy-sucking brightly lit Apple store that was wrapped in plastic ware (oh, but it looks so nice - it can't be bad for the environment) and placed into a plastic shopping bag for you to take home and destroy the environment.

-End of Rant-

....and yes we also carried my wife's new head phones in a medium sized plastic Apple shopping bag that we'll use to pick up our dog's pooh when we take her for a walk around our neighborhood.

(disclaimer: yes - I own an iMac and and two iPods)

Aclockalypse Now

A 15 year old boy was kept in the slammer for 12 days after being accused of calling in a bomb threat on the morning of the Aclockalypse.  Turns out, he was just calling the school recorded information line and the time stamps lined up with bomb threat (sort of) when they traced the call origination to his cell phone.  Only problem was that the time stamp was off by an hour because some genius at the school hadn't reset the clocks for the daylight savings time.

Read the full details here at TechDirt.

I'm still trying to figure who is making money on this whole time change business.  I'm convinced it's a racket to decrease the productivity of workers and businesses in an attempt to reduce the GNP of the US.

John Doerr Cries - Sheds Tears Over Global Warming

Hearing about John Doerr crying at TED about Global Warming is a new low for Venture Capitalists.

I was going to write "...a new low for humanity" but many of you would have been offended at me grouping Venture Capitalists with the rest of us (humanity). 

Let's just stop this nonsense and overreacting.  Let's just stop people. Just stop.  Grow up.

Enough with the The Crying Game.

SITCOM

SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. “Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage”

Source:  www.officeslang.com (click here for more semi-funny word aphorisms)

My "24" Skype Ringtone

Moments of Clarity pointed me to a CTU Ringtone.  Now, I've never bought a ringtone in my life (my children will probably be the first "Garcia" to ever do so as well), but I am a big enough "24" fan to add it to my Skype ring....

Here you go. (It's a .wav file)